Today put me back into a stupid realization that I'm subconsciously I'm not over it still. I hate feeling this stupid emptiness of what could have been. I've always lived dwelling on my past I need to break that habit and I really don't know how. Life has a sick way of playing itself out, this is the only part that gets me; " the rest of the night was extremely cute." That's what she said about her night with Anthony, I don't even know the dude, but I fucking hate him getting something that I wanted so badly from her. I'm quite sure they're going to date. I can sincerely say I envy him whole-heartedly right now, I thought that I was over it. But me being the person that I am, I had to take a look and that's what I get for looking in the wrong places for answers. I need to be looking for a resolution instead of looking at my problem. I don't know anymore I just don't fucking know. I NEED TO FIND SOMETHING BETTER FOR MYSELF. HELP. PLEASE.